I really hate when I put food in the microwave and it starts popping and making explosive noises so I check it and it’s freezing cold like why you gotta play me like that
“high school are the best years of your life”
“your teen years are worry free”
“everything is so easy for you”
“you aren’t living in the real world yet”
hipsters: Im not a hipster, but i can make your hips stir!
me: Im not water but i'll fucking drown you
In physics the other day my teacher started having this coughing fit
so he says ‘I THINK SATAN IS CHOKING ME’
and I just went ‘Sorry’ and he stopped coughing
omg I think everyone in my class is terrified now.
i am still laughing at this from like twenty minutes ago
I’m so insecure like I could be married to my husband of 40 years and I would still wonder if he likes me or not
This just shows that something once “ugly” can turn beautiful.
Life changes.
People change.its a fucking strawberry
No. This is someone dying while having an MRI scan. Before you die, your brain releases tons and tons of endorphins, making you feel a range of emotions that turn you into a red strawberry. Tragically beautiful.
no it says lettuce
no it says never give up
OMG HOW DARE YOU CALL THIS UGLY
CHECK YOUR RIPENED FRUIT PRIVILEGE
SHIET
Fun fact: When I get an erection, my penis does this exact same transformation
It grows 1/16 of an inch bigger?
SNAPSNAPSNAPSNAPSNAP
SNAP
SNAP
SNAP
SNAPSNAPSNAPSNAPSNAP
I wasn’t going to reblog this until I saw all of the comments.
I hate all of you
SO I GET HOME AND THERE’S THIS RANDOM KID ON MY COUCH AND HE’S LIKE ‘ALRIGHT MAN I DON’T WANNA HURT U JUST PUT UR STUFF DOWN AND GET ON THE GROUND I JUST WANT UR MONEY’ AND I FUCKIN ALMOST PUKED I WAS LIKE “OMG PLS NO I DON’T HAVE ANY MONEY I’M ONLY 15” THEN HE WAS LIKE “NAH MAN I’M JUST FUCKIN WITH U I’M UR BROTHER’S FRIEND HE’S IN THE SHOWER I’M JUST WAITIN FOR HIM”
